Tender Moments and Heated Exchanges
by mrswentworth1904
Summary: A series of What-If's from Jane Austen's Persuasion. Those moments in the book which you may have wished just had that little bit more. Hidden feelings spoken aloud and conversations that could have taken place.
1. Chapter 1

**_What If …_** **Sophia knew?**

 _The rest was all tranquillity; till, just as they were moving, she heard the Admiral say to Mary-"We are expecting a brother of Mrs Croft's here soon; I dare say you know him by name."_

Anne suddenly found her lap most interesting and her gaze fell to it repeatedly. She felt sure, should she open her mouth, she would find herself spilling the truth to everyone. The more she concentrated on controlling her actions and concealing the facts, the more she felt their eyes on her, waiting for her to fall apart.

"Why Miss Anne, you looked quite peeked, pray would you take a turn about the gardens with me? The fresh air may serve you well." Mrs Croft smiled kindly and Anne felt powerless to resist.

"Well I … that is… yes, of course." She stood shakily and followed, leaving Mary most displeased at the prospect of entertaining The Admiral and her boys alone.

Anne followed Mrs Croft down a winding path until they were free of the house and its inhabitants. Mrs Croft then surprised her by taking her arm in hers, just as old friends would, and leaning in to her, as if not wanting to be overheard. "I suspect Miss Anne, _you_ are more concerned with my younger brother Frederick's news, rather than that of Edwards, as I believe it was you whose company he was in most when he was here last." Anne was glad to be leaning on the other woman as she felt a wave of heat overcome her and her legs begin to buckle. Mrs Croft oblivious, continued, "Or I am I wrong in suspecting the two of you were … _involved_."

Anne stopped and looked around her wildly for anyone or anything to save her from this interrogation. "I wasn't aware ... no one … you were abroad at the time." She stuttered in response. "I remember. I believe Fre- _Captain Wentworth_ to have shared our secret with none but his brother at the time."

Mrs Croft smiled again and took Anne's hand, placing it back on her arm and moved them on. "Yes I confess it was our dear brother whom first drew my attention to the possibility." She said apologetically. "I had no notion such an attachment had existed." She exclaimed. "Edward was most concerned our dear Frederick maybe distressed at us living here and I would not rest until I knew all the particulars surrounding why."

Anne's eyes widened and she frowned. The woman had obviously brought her out here to scold her for causing her brother such heartbreak – quite rightly so. "Mrs Croft, you must allow me to apologise, if I had known he would be returning for certain, and I had the means to, I would have quit this place at once." She assured her. "I should not like to impose on anyone's feelings or cause them distress. I should not wish my presence to cause the Captain to feel uncomfortable. When the Captain and I-"

"I should stop you there my dear," Mrs Croft interrupted holding up her other hand, "although I know of your engagement, I do not know any of the specifics around its ending. I was not even privy to you name. Edward would not divulge such information without Frederick's permission." Anne opened her mouth to ask how then did she know she was the lady, when she continued. "Now it is my turn to apologise, for I am afraid I would not let the matter settle until I at least knew the young lady's name. I re-read several letters sent by both of my brothers at the time and discovered a 'Miss Elliot of Kellynch' mentioned several times. The rest, I confess, was pure guess work." she shrugged.

Anne coloured, first at the fact they had been found out and second that Frederick had mentioned her in his letters. It was silly she knew, to be pleased by such information, but she was. Anne took a deep breath in letting it out slowly, knowing it was a waste of time denying something Mrs Croft already knew to be true, besides, Anne knew in her heart her face must already be betraying her. For the very mention of him and their time together, caused her such pain and regret, she was sure it would be plain for anyone to see. "Well done Mrs Croft for you are quite the detective." She admitted sadly. "You are correct. It was I. Your brother and I-" She looked away into the distance trying hard to fight the memories forcing their way to the surface, and fell silent.

Mrs Croft felt awkward at causing the lovely Miss Anne pain, she could tell she felt it. Even though she did not know all the details, she did know it could not have ended well. After all, they were not together, yet neither had ever married, despite -she was sure- receiving offers, and the fact neither seemed willing to put aside their past and become re-acquainted. Frederick had made a point of assuring his sister he minded not, them living there and that he had no reason not to return to the area. Anne herself had not brought their connection to anyone's attention.

Sensing Mrs Croft's guilt, Anne smiled. "I forgive you for your curiosity, for I believe I would have been the same if it had been one of my sisters." She smiled half-heartedly and then said seriously, "I would ask in return, that you please do not share any of this with the others in our party. Almost everyone here is unaware of our _understanding_ , however fleeting, and I –and most likely your brother- would prefer it to stay that way." Anne pleaded with Mrs Croft who only frowned and nodded her reluctant agreement, before both ladies returned to the house.


	2. Chapter 2

**_What If …_** **Frederick doth protest too much?**

 _"That is the woman I want," said he. "Something a little inferior I shall of course put up with, but it must not be much. If I am a fool, I shall be a fool indeed, for I have thought on the subject more than most men."_

Sophia rolled her eyes at her brother and poured the tea. His lack of specific description of his perfect wife maybe all well and good, but it would not make him happy. It couldn't possibly be just any insipid woman that would keep her brother content. He would be bored before the first year of marriage was out. He needed a connection; a spark, something to keep him on his toes and in line. She also hated the fact he had never mentioned love. There was a time, when they had all agreed that none of the siblings would marry for anything _but_ love and she was sure her and her brother Edward had kept to it. She was amazed that Frederick now spoke of marriage and his future wife, more as a duty he had to perform and in that way was picking out the best deckhand for the job.

It seemed to Sophia that rather than describe what he was looking for in a wife, he had simply listed all of Miss Anne's attributes and then constructed a second list of their opposites. For it was plain to her, Frederick was in no uncertain terms, making it clear he would marry anyone _except_ Anne Elliot. Something she found very hard to believe, considering their past. She knew despite not knowing why they ended their attachment, it must have been Anne's doing, for nothing else short of a spurn like that, could have caused Frederick's caustic attitude towards what, she could only describe as a lovely young woman, severely over looked by all those around her. Sure the Misses Musgrove were young, sweet and from a good family, but they would not fit. Frederick needed something more, something she knew must have been present in Miss Anne for him to fall for her in the first place.

She now had two questions that troubled her greatly: why had Miss Anne chosen to end their engagement, and what had happened since to change her? So much so, that even if Frederick was meeting her for the first time, he would not be interested. For this Anne, as lovely as she may be, was nothing like the young woman described so vividly in Fredericks letters of the past. It also occurred to her that, that although Frederick seemed to think either of these young ladies would foot the bill, it appeared to her that the attribute Frederick was most concerned with, that of their knowing their own mind, was not as present in them as he believed. For they seemed quite willing to bend their own thoughts and opinions to match whatever Frederick suggested were his own.

She would rather have someone who was prepared to argue with him to see her point of view, or at least debate matters. These girls had a stubborn streak to be sure, but she feared it was more likely a lingering from the years in the nursery trying to fight their governess or disagreeing with their papa, than that of a mature opinionated woman. Frederick was older now, and had more life experience, they would not have enough in common to keep either happy in marriage. It also took a certain lady to be able to handle being a Captains wife, and she doubted either of those two had the mettle. Their foolish questions and girlish giggles were all well and good when both of the lovers were young and care free, and full of the want for the mysteries of life, but Frederick was neither of these things anymore.

He had passed the want for a sweetheart, and was now in need of a wife. A companion and someone who could last the course. She was adamant neither of these girls were suitable.

Still, it was not her decision and despite her preferences towards Miss Anne, she knew Frederick was still seeing her through hatred filled eyes and would never even consider a future with her. She was sure, in return, Miss Anne would never push herself into his sights, for fear of rejection and so would probably end up alone. Therefore leaving all parties unhappy. The problem was, no matter how many times she told herself to let the matters rest and Frederick make his own foolish mistakes, she could not stand by idly and watch two people end up lonely and even more broken hearted than they already appeared to be.

"Surely if this is the case Frederick, and you are so open to suggestions, you should widen your net, so to speak, and not concentrate solely on those inhabitants of The Great House at Uppercross. There are other women available, who surname is not Musgrove." Sophia pointed out.

Frederick glared at Sophia who chose to ignore him. The Admiral, oblivious to the little confrontation and in the most part, to the facts surrounding Anne and Fredericks past, joined in the conversation. "Yes my boy, your sister is right, we could choose to dine with some other families. I am sure there are many pretty maidens around here, who would be eager to make the acquaintance of a Navy fellow like yourself. Maybe you should take your sisters advice and look around a bit more first."

Frederick got to his feet and begun to pace about the room. "Aye Admiral that would be an idea, if it wasn't for the fact Sophia had no intention of letting me look around for someone else, she already has her eyes firmly set on the lady she would like to become my wife, unfortunately for her, it is the one woman I would never have, not if she was the last woman on this earth."

"I find it hard to believe that a woman who so enthralled you as to warrant an proposal of marriage only a few years ago, can be so far removed from your heart, that you cannot be anything more than strangers with her now. There must be some feelings still there Frederick, there must." Sophia insisted.

"I shall marry Sophia, and it shall not be to her." He stalked towards Sophia and leaned over his sister intimidatingly. Although as Sophia knew him as only an elder sister could, he did not intimidate her in the least. "Never to her." He repeated. "That part of my life is over and the sooner you come to realise that, the better. You are only setting yourself up for disappointment. If you do care for this lady in anyway like that which I think you do, or your brother, you should cease your meddling now." He walked away and leaned on the mantel piece shutting his eyes against their watchful gaze. "She did not want me then," he said softly, "so she does not get to have me now." He paused and turned back to face his sister. "The sooner you realise that and forget this fantastical notion of yours, the better."

"Now see here Frederick, you forget that is your sister, my wife you are talking to, I suggest you apologise and refrain from addressing her in such a manner in my presence -or indeed without me being here to witness it, again." The Admiral warned him. Sophia smiled lovingly at her husband who was always mindful of her considerations.

Frederick sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose with his hand before sighing again and finally addressing his siblings. "I apologise Admiral, Sophia you know I mean you no malice, but this idea, this dream you have of putting the pair of us back together, it will never happen." He pleaded. "She does not want me in that way, it transpires she never did, and I certainly do not harbour feelings for her. Not anymore." He said adamantly.

Sophia shuffled in her seat, straightening her dress and picking up her tea cup and saucer. "If you say so Frederick." She took a sip from her cup and replaced it. "I promise I shall not mention it again."

Frederick left the room, his cheeks red and his hands fisted at his sides. The Admiral came to his wife's side and took her hand in his. "I am sorry my love, that your brother does not see the world as do you, I know of which lady you are talking, and you are right she does seem the most suitable, however it is not our decision to make and if Frederick is set against her, then it will not do to raise your hopes or hers. You see the way he is, he does not care for her." The Admiral soothed.

"Oh my dear husband." Sophia sighed, "All that little display has shown me, is that there is still hope after all." She informed him.

"But-" the Admiral looked confused.

"He would never have reacted quite so violently, if he had no feelings for her. He would have only shrugged it off or even laughed, the fact that he was so adamantly refusing her, only makes me believe it all the more. No that business is far from finished, and until it is, and he proves to me there are no feelings left, I refuse to let them carry on with this farcical notion of treating each other like mere strangers." she explained.

"You do what you think is best my dear, but be careful. The more you push, the more likely Frederick is to run in the other direction straight in to the open arms of one of these young girls you are so intent on turning him away from."


	3. Chapter 3

**_What If …_** **Anne had followed?**

 _"Now I have done," cried Captain Wentworth. "When once married people begin to attack me with, - 'oh! You will think very differently, when you are married.' I can only say, 'No, I shall not,' and then they say again, 'Yes, you will,' and there is an end of it."_

He got up and moved away.

Anne fidgeted in her seat. Mrs Croft was engaged in conversation with Mrs Musgrove and yet her eyes repeatedly flickered between Anne's, and the door the Captain had just left through. It was obvious she was still trying to piece together what had happened.

After he had been gone enough time as to not draw suspicion, Anne herself made her own excuses and escaped into the gardens for some air. She did not mean to follow him, she just needed to be out of the company of others. The room had become stifling, and her fake smiles tiresome. She should not have come. It was torture to be in the same room, at the same table. Why was she putting herself through this?

A noise distracted her from her thoughts and she realised that, without planning to, she had wandered far from the house and deep into the unlit garden. Feeling a little apprehensive in the dark and alone, she turned to return to the hall, when a shadow caught her attention. The shadow moved and she held her breath, as a man stepped from the darkness. Her disposition was only momentarily appeased, as she became aware it was Captain Wentworth. Relief soon turned to anxiety again when it appeared he had no intention of letting her return, without first engaging her in some conversation, much to the torment of her and most probably for his enjoyment alone.

Frederick saw the look on her face when she had realised it was him, and her eagerness to be away from him, and it hurt him to find her so repelled by his presence. At the same time, he was convinced she had followed him out there to try and talk to him alone. He had been amused to find her standing on her own, looking out into the darkness searching for what he could only guess was himself. "I beg your pardon, I did not mean to frighten you." he explained.

"You did not." Anne answered automatically. She looked about her before sighing to herself. "I should return." She turned to leave but he stepped forward and that single movement rendered her motionless.

"Why are you out here? Alone?" He looked at the ground rather than meet her eyes. "We're you looking for someone?" he said somewhat smugly.

Anne rolled her eyes at the arrogance of his assumption and began walking back towards the house.

"Anne!" he called after her. She turned instantly at the use of her Christian name and the memories it sparked. Out here, just the two of them in the dark, at one time – a long time ago- they would have leapt at the opportunity of spending time together, to be alone. None of this awkward tension between them. He moved closer to her and she felt her heart quicken inside her chest. "Miss Elliot," he corrected himself. "Will you not let me escort you back inside?" His eyes still refused to meet hers and she felt that pain most keenly.

"It would hardly be appropriate." She frowned. She had said the first thing that came to her. When did she become this blundering mess around him? Before, she was witty, before they shared a friendly banter. _Before_.

He chuckled dryly and she stepped back once more, determined to walk away, when he grabbed her arm preventing her. The contact made them both gasp. The very air around them seemed to crackle and spark. He recovered first. "Would it not be considered more inappropriate, should we arrive at the same time, but _without_ me escorting you?"

"I will leave first and you can join our party a few minutes after." Anne suggested.

He gave her a half smile and it took her breath away. "It is a very cold night, why should I remain out here?" he shrugged. Anne shook her head and let out a frustrated moan. Long ago this would have been a debate she would have enjoyed participating in as the continued conversation meant a delay in their parting. She now knew he no longer felt that way, and so this was nothing but merciless teasing for him. She was not prepared to be sport for him. She opened her mouth to tell him so, when he beat her to it. His face had lost all trace of the beginnings of the smile and instead he looked grave. "My sister seems to be acting upon the miss-apprehension we are on the verge of a reunion."

Anne was taken aback at the statement, and more so at the accusation behind it. "Well she has not heard such a story from me," she answered honestly. "If that is what you are implying Captain. I am well aware of how repulsive such an idea is to you, and I would not fill Mrs Croft with false hope." She snapped. He blanched and she paused. "I am very fond of her." she added quietly. _She_ dare not meet _his_ gaze now, but she sensed he was smiling. She could not be sure and she could not risk seeing his beautiful smile fully directed at her, it would be agony. She fixed her eyes at his feet. "It pains me every time she and I are together, that I cannot be honest with her."

"I will not have her know!" he barked.

The difference in volume alarmed her, but not overly so. She knew his temper, even if before it was rarely aimed at her. In fact there was only one time previously when it had been. And that time, he was entitled to lay blame at her feet.

He paced about. "What is past is past, and there is no need for her to know the details. I would not have her know of any history between us at all, if it had not been for my brother and his loose lips. As soon as he wrote and informed her of our connection all those years ago, I was forced to tell her what had happened. As much as I could stand to tell her." At his words, and more so at the tone in which they were delivered –honest and hurt- Anne forced herself to meet his gaze which had at last landed on her. "Do not fool yourself into believing you are the only one who feels guilty for keeping my sister ignorant in this matter Miss Elliot." His words were bitter, and the last two especially, seemed to have been pulled from his lips in pure hatred.

Anne straightened her back, "it has been your choice to keep her in the dark Captain Wentworth, although I do not understand why. I am sure in your version of events I would come across as an absolute monster in all proceedings." Anne hissed, just as bitter.

"My version!" he almost yelled. "Do not pretend to appear the victim in all this Anne, it was _you_ who did the leaving. It was _you_ who ended things between us, and _you_ who broke _my_ heart." He was yelling now, and yet his voice wavered.

Anne fell silent. He was right. She had done all those things. She swallowed her fear and found herself addressing him again, his eyes had never left her face, and now the ache in them was almost destroying her. "I am sorry if I have misguided Mrs Croft in any way. Truly, it was not my intention to do so. I should be glad to put her right at the earliest opportunity." She promised.

He stared at her for what seemed to Anne like an eternity before he sighed, clenching his eyes shut and opening them again, "Thank you." He said flatly.

"Sir." She curtseyed in response, and turned.

"Miss Elliot." he bowed to her retreating form, as she left him stood in the dark, concluding their business was anything but over.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you for the kind reviews. I'm not sure how far I will be going with this. I aimed for ten 'moments' at first, but it could be more. Any excuse to write about my favourite couple.**

 ** _What if_** **… Frederick questioned her playing?**

 _"Oh no; never; she has quite given up dancing. She had rather play. She is never tired of playing."_

Captain Wentworth begged off the next dance in lieu of acquiring some refreshment. However, once sated, he found himself lingering near the piano, or more, the lady sitting at it. Anne remained focused on her playing, although aware she was being observed, she managed to keep her concentration as he moved closer and began to speak. "You no longer dance?" he murmured.

She could not tell if he meant it as a question or merely a statement, but she chose to answer him none the less. "No not anymore. Not for a long time." She admitted, refusing to meet his gaze once again. Whenever she was around him, she found herself unable to think rationally, or stop herself from blurting out the first words that came into her head.

He was quiet for a long time and she had just begun to relax again when he spoke, "you used to love to dance." he reminded her.

It was the first time he had referred to their shared past directly and not in hate. They had touched on it previously; danced around the details, but the subject had not been fully explored. Although they had spoken about Mrs Crofts' knowledge of its existence, neither had actually mentioned the relationship itself, or their time together in the past.

She struggled to keep her composure. "I used to love to dance when you were my partner." Her eyes widened in horror, again she had said what she was thinking, rather than a prepared answer. It was too late to take it back, so she sat bravely squaring her shoulders and dared a sideways glance at him. She saw his mouth open as if he wanted to speak, but in that moment Louisa signalled for him to join her. Anne rolled her eyes at the flirtatious actions. The poor girl was so obvious, it was laughable. "Go." Anne told him. "Go enlighten the Miss Musgroves' with more exciting tales of your previous activities at sea. I am sure you will find them a more captivated audience." she said sarcastically, turning the page with her free hand, an action she had practiced time again.

He leaned over her at the same time to turn the page for her, as he once had, and accidentally brushed her hand. She started, almost missing a note, more so at the shock of him obviously having followed her playing, then at the contact. "They are not merely stories," he hissed in her ear. "These _activities_ as you call them, left my life in the balance on more than one occasion, and then what would have become of me? Naught but a paragraph in the corner of the newspaper."

She blushed at his honesty. He mistook it as embarrassment. "You must excuse my behaviour Miss Elliot if it offended you, but at this point in my life; fortune made and my position secure, I am intent on being settled. Taking a wife, and starting a family. The misses Musgrove are amiable and sweet, and should they return my attentions," he paused smiling at Louisa across the room. "All the better for me."

He turned on his heel and went to Louisa's side. If he had looked back, he would have seen the silent tears as they rolled down Anne's cheeks.

She had wanted to scream at him how much she cared, how she had followed every bit of information relating to him and his career she could get her hands on, how she knew he had worked hard and through that, and his determination, he had fulfilled his plans and she was proud of him. She wanted to tell him how it would have crumpled her already broken heart, should the worst have happened. How she barely survived their separation, but news of his demise, would have surely ended her also. How despite her own heart break, she was pleased he was ready to settle. How she was trying to be pleased that their experience had not put him off the idea of marriage. How he would make a fine husband and an excellent father. How distraught she was, knowing what she had thrown away.

But, she had said nothing.

She had let him walk away just like all those years before. She was just as cowardly now, as she was then. She didn't deserve him, so it was her punishment to sit by and watch as he made plans with someone else, to watch another girl succumb to his charms and fall in love with him. She knew they would, as in her opinion, it was impossible not to. They would be happy and she would be alone. As always. As was her fate. She had held happiness in her hands and like water, it had been impossible to keep hold of, if only she had clung on a little more, fought her demons and her relatives advice. This all would have been a very different story.


	5. Chapter 5

**_What if_** **… Anne** ** _did_** **thank him?**

 _"In another moment, however, she found herself in the state of being released from him; someone was taking him from her, though he had bent down her head so much, that his little sturdy hands were unfastened from around her neck, and he was resolutely borne away, before she knew that Captain Wentworth had done it."_

Walter made his escape and Charles Hayter had gone in search of Charles, and so they found themselves alone, bar the injured child who was now captivated by his toys.

Anne bravely took a step towards him, assuming the position of looking out of the window. "Thank you." She said quietly.

"Why do you let them treat you this way?" He hissed in response.

"My nephews?"

"Your family. Those who claim to love you as themselves and yet treat you so abominably."

Anne's eyes darted around the room, afraid someone may have overheard his opinion. "Captain please, you talk as if I was no better than a servant in my own home." She tried to smile, but it wouldn't come.

"Are you not? You, who upon my learning, orchestrated the closing of Kellynch. You, who take your sisters repsonsibilites on as your own, and your fathers financial woes no doubt. You let yourself be brought to whomever needs you next, without any thought of yourself or your own wishes. Mary, treats you like her personal nursemaid and nanny to her children-"

"That is enough!" Anne sobbed. He turned to face her and immediately wished he had not. Her eyes were brimming with tears. She paused to compose herself, checking little Charles hadn't noticed anything. "Captain Wentworth, how dare you accuse my family of such mis-behaviour, and I of such wilful personal neglect? You have no right to tell me how I should or should not live my life, for it is _my_ life. _My_ burden, _my_ choice, _my_ regret, _my_ punishment, and _I_ will bear it as _I_ see fit. Please do not stand there and suggest I deserve otherwise, for I do not."

He shook his head confused by her speech. "Punishment? Anne, surely you do not believe-"

"Please sir," she interrupted. "Either change the subject of this conversation, or leave me be." Anne pleaded.

She dabbed at her eyes with a handkerchief, wishing what he said was not true or that she could run from this house, this life, and be somewhere else, where no one knew her and where she could begin again, the sins of her past wiped from her memory. But no, she was here and so was he. Anne would be forced to witness him seek out another and give her the life that should have been her own.

Captain wentworth was lost in his own thoughts. He was undoubtedly conflicted. He had come back here with the sole intention of showing Anne just what she had thrown away – to prove to her the kind of life she would have had, should she have had the courage to stay with him. He imagined some sort of competition between the two of them. No doubt she would have one or two beau's who held her interest, and he would match that with attentions of his own.

Or so he had thought.

Then he had arrived there to find her, not only still unattached, but living some sort of half life, a mere existence. She was a shadow of her former self; physically, and in her personality. Her playful attitude, her witty banter and clever quips had all escaped her, and left only a shell, to be used by others in whichever way they deemed fit. Suddenly the competition had lost its appeal.

He had convinced himself of his indifference concerning Anne Elliot. He no longer cared about, or for her. And yet, when he had seen her in distress -even just at the hands of her young nephew- he had immediately gone to her rescue. If it had been eight years ago, he would have welcomed the excuse just to touch her, and would have held on as long as possible.

As it was, his fingers had burned at the contact and he had felt distaste at the realisation of how her frame -once on its way to becoming curvaceous and womanly- had shrunk back to that of a girl. She was slight and willowly and it angered him just at seeing her used, and more at her, for allowing it, he had voiced his thoughts instead of allowing them to remain hidden. Now he was angrier still.

He thought of her confession, that she saw how she was treated now, as some form of punishment. For what, he wondered? For us - he dared to think. He stepped foward to ask her, when they were joined by the Musgroves ladies. In the commotion Anne slipped by him and his question went un-answered.


	6. Chapter 6

**_What If_** **… Sophia wouldn't let it rest?**

 _"The Admirals kind urgency came in support of his wife's; they would not be refused, they compressed themselves into the smallest possible space to leave her a corner, and Captain's Wentworth without saying a word, turned to her, and quietly obliged her to be assisted into the carriage."_

"Thank you for your assistance Captain." She whispered softly and urgently.

He didn't meet her eyes, instead he nodded and then leaning forward, murmured so only she would hear, "please remember your promise." He looked to Sophia and she understood his meaning.

"Of course." She murmured back and with the Admiral's flick of the reins, she was away.

Tha Admiral wasted no time in voicing his opinion on the subject of Frederick and his ever changing tendencies towards the Musgrove girls. He wished he would just pick one and save them all a lot of time. It was obvious he meant to have _one_ of them, it just seemed he was having trouble making up his mind as to which.

Sophia looked at Anne blushing and exchanged a look with her husband, that had him cease his chosen subject of conversation instantly. After a few minutes of silence, Sophia addressed Anne. "I still do not understand what happened to part you two." Sophia admitted. Anne swallowed hard. Sophia, undeterred, continued, "I do not expect you to confide in me and share all your secrets, _yet_. However, please know my dear, I am here for you when you are ready." She gave Anne a warm smile and rested a hand on hers. Anne was almost beginning to relax when Sophia spoke again. "It is obvious to me, you are perfect for one another."

Anne shut her eyes against the threat of hopeless tears, "Mrs Croft." she pleaded, opening her eyes, "If your brother is unwilling to divuldge the detals of our attatchment, then you must understand, I cannot go against his wishes. You are his sister."

"As were you. Almost." She winked and smiled. Anne was speechless. A few moments of silence passed and Anne was hoping the awkward conversation was over. It was by surprise Mrs Croft caught her with her next words. "Do you still care for him?"

Sophia did not meet Anne's eye, or her husband's, as his head snapped round to look at his wife in dismay. Anne felt trapped, she could not ignore the question, or to lie to a woman she now considered her friend, and yet if she did answer honestly, she would be going against Captain Wentworth's wishes of pandering to his sister and her questions.

Mrs Croft, sensing the tension and knowing her question must have placed her new friend in a difficult position opened her mouth to tell the young lady she was sorry and that she did not need to answer such a question, when Anne's voice broke the quiet. "I will always care for him, that will never change."

Anne had answered truthfully.

Her feelings for him had never, and would never, waiver. He had been the first person outside of her family, she had claimed to love. The first man whoever showed her attention, whom she was inclined to return such attention to. The first person since her mother, to have listened and understood her in a way no one had since. He had been the one she could imagine herself growing old with in a way she never could have with Charles Musgrove, or anyone else who had ever fancied himself drawn to miss Anne Elliot.

It was lucky that any male attentions had all but ceased after he had left. She knew how much she had changed after he was gone, with no one to bring her out of it, she had retreated into her shell and remained there ever since. There had only been Charles who had taken the time to speak with her and try to know her better, but it was all for naught on his part. She could never love another man as she had Captain Wentworth, and because of that, she would never marry.

She knew she should, that she should try to lighten the already heavy burden her father had placed upon him; two ageing spinster daughters still living at home under his care, but she failed to see how she ever could. She supposed eventually, if ever someone was to ask, she would be obliged to say yes, after all, _he_ would no doubt be married himself by then and then what would it matter? Either single or in a marriage of convenience, she would remain alone and unloved. She could see the Crofts were hanging on, awaiting her next words with trepidation, so she continued.

"However, _his_ feelings, I fear, have already found another home." She acknowledged the Admiral's earlier observations with a nod towards him. "I have resound myself to the fact our _acquaintance,_ was nothing more than a mere dalliance between two young people" she lied. Remembering her promise to the Captain, she swallowed and continued, "I urge you to do the same Mrs Croft. We cannot dwell on things out of our control and power to change. It can only result in pain and distress for all those involved." Anne stated resolutely.

Mrs Croft only smiled. "Perhaps."


	7. Chapter 7

**_What if …_** **Anne and Wentworth spoke in Lyme?**

 _"All subjects ceased, on seeing Louisa and Captain Wentworth coming towards them."_

Henrietta and Anne greeted the newcomers and exchanged pleasantries. All the while Anne and Frederick avoided each other's gaze. Louisa was anxious to procure something from a shop she had seen the day before, and so the four set off to fulfil her wish. Anne lagged behind, not sure she should have even joined them, it was only on the behest of Henrietta's silent plea she had acquiesced. Captain Wentworth, kept shooting sideways glances at her as if daring himself to coverse with her.

Once they arrived at the shop, Henrietta followed Louisa inside, Anne was about to make her way inside also, when she felt a touch on her arm, it was slight; the barest contact, but she felt it. She turned and found the Captain looking directly at her. "I wanted to say thank you." He blurted out.

Anne looked up to see if the other girls had reappeared; perhaps his statement was addressed to them. However they were still inside, out of their sight and ear shot. She realised he must have been talking to her, however unlikely that was. "Thank you? For what?" She searched her mind trying to think of a service she had rendered him.

"For Benwick," Frederick explained, "for spending time with him," he elaborated.

"It was no chore I can assure you." She smiled genuinely. "I enjoyed talking with him, he is a good man." She answered honestly. He frowned, as if her opinion displeased him. She knew she should join the others inside, but she couldn't willingly leave with him at odds with her. She attempted to rouse his attention once again. "A good friend of yours I believe." She smiled to herself when he looked at her again. "He talks of you most highly."

Frederick then looked away embarrassed. "He is a good man." He agreed.

"You are both good men." she whispered.

The Captain's head snapped up and he looked both surprised and hurt by her words. He looked away again to gather his thoughts, and realised for the first time his hand was still on her arm. He looked down at it, wondering whether or not to remove it, and as he did, drew Annes attention to the fact.

She stood on the step unable or unwilling to move, she longed for more conversation and not harsh words like they had exchanged previously. There was a time when they would have spoken for hours, when they would have to force themselves not to look at each other for propriety's sake. Now everything had changed and it was her doing.

Her fault.

She scowled, internally chastising herself for all her past mistakes and how they haunted her still.

He mistook her expression for insult at his arrogance; _ho_ _w dare he place his hand on her?_ Somewhat reluctantly he removed it, not wishing to offend her. She frowned at the action and he found himself puzzled. She turned to leave once again, when he spoke, eager to keep her company for as long as possible. "And the Harvilles? I am anxious to hear what your opinion is of them. I realise they are not the sort of people you are used to associating with."

This time Anne spun round on the spot, her brow furrowed. "They are very good people whose company I have enjoyed most especially. They may not be 'the people' I normally associate with, but that does not mean I think less of them." She retorted. "I should have been pleased and proud to call them our friends – should that have been the case-" she gasped, her hand flew to her mouth, she could not help but blurt things out around him.

She felt herself blush, her face heating up under his stare, for that was what he was doing –staring at her; his lips slightly parted, his eyes wide. They stood facing each other, both as speechless as the other. She would not apologise for what she had said, however inappropriate, it was the truth and she would not take it back. She bravely stood her ground and waited for him to reprimand her for speaking out of turn, but none came.

He half smiled, shaking his head and chuckled dryly. "I am sorry for accusing you. I should not have assumed you had formed the same high and mighty opinions as your father and sisters. You were never like that previously, it was wrong of me to think you would change." his eyes never left her face. "You are right, the Harvilles are good people, and they would have been good friends of ours. I have to content myself with being their friend alone. Still, I am glad you approve of them."

Anne could not speak, nor move. She could barely even breathe, she opened her mouth to tell him – she didn't know what! But she had to let him know her feelings. She closed it before opening it again, this time as she did, his eyebrows lifted in anticipation.

"Anne we need you in here please, please come this instant. Help settle this with your opinion."

She looked inside the shop to where Louisa's voice was coming from. Once she assured herself they were unlikely to come outside looking for her, she turned back. Anne bit her lip and looked back at the Captain apologetically. His eyes were pleading with her to stay.

She had seen that look before; he wanted her to say whatever it was she had been about to say before they were interrupted. Her bravado had failed her, her fleeting courage had disappeared. "I am sorry." she mumbled and followed Louisa's voice inside.

Frederick muttered a swear word under his breath and kicked the step. He had been on the verge of hearing her confession he was sure, now he would have to endeavour to orchestrate another moment for them to be alone together.


	8. Chapter 8

To SassenachLassy you read my mind! I hope this will suffice.

 ** _What If_** **… Frederick's jealousy showed?**

 _"That man is struck with you, and even I at this moment see something like Anne Elliot again."_

Anne was that distracted by her second encounter with the man from the Cobb at the Inn in which they were staying, she did not see whom was coming towards her along the corridor, until it was too late and they had collided. "Oh I do beg your pardon Sir, I-" She looked up and saw Captain Wentworth looking down at her, the smallest hint of a smile playing about his lips.

"No apologies necessary Miss Elliot, it was I who should have been looking where I was going. I was just-"

The gentleman appeared again, walking past once more, smiling pointedly at Anne and tipping his hat in Frederick's general direction without actually meeting his eye. Frederick scowled. "Making new friends I see." he nearly sneered, through gritted teeth.

Anne almost rolled her eyes at his presumptuousness. "I would hardly call him a friend, I do not even know his name. We have yet to be introduced."

"Well he seemed anxious to know you better. A bit of advice: you should be careful, alone in a corridor with a man."

She pulled a face and raised an eyebrow at him, "you are right. If you will excuse me."

Frederick let out an exasperated sigh. He had not been referring to himself, he _was_ a man, but not a stranger. "I am sorry Anne." He said softly. The use of her Christian name again, so tenderly, halted her tracks. "That was … unforgivable of me. I did not mean to imply ... I only meant… you look… _different_ here." He stuttered. " _Well_ , I mean, you look well. I saw the way he looked at you on the steps as we passed him this morning. He obviously took notice." _As have I_ , he added silently.

Anne coloured. "It is the sea air I believe, it does have the tendency to heighten ones colour and better the complexion."

"Yes" he agreed and then looked away. She made to move past him, but he side stepped with her. "You like the sea then, that is-" he trailed off, unable to find the words he needed.

"Yes, yes very much," she admitted. "I confess I doubt I should ever tire of watching the waves or listening to the sound of the ocean as it crashes against the rocks, it brings to mind many lines of poetry and verse."

"Yes you and Benwick have been discussing them at great length." He looked away embarrassed, "I believe."

"As I have already said, I have enjoyed my debates with Captain Benwick, his chosen favourites were however, more along the lines of failed romance rather the power of nature."

"Quite" he murmured. She stepped to the side again, and again, he mirrored her action. "So do you still see yourself living in the countryside, or has the more scenic views of the coast changed your mind?"

She began to smile at the memory of a once forgotten conversation, and then remembered herself and the smile turned to a frown. Something like regret and disappointment flashed in her eyes, and he could not understand how a simple question could cause her such distress. "I … " she paused, "as I am to return to Bath after this trip, where I shall remain with my father, until I am needed again elsewhere, I doubt I shall see the sea again for quite some time."

The Captain's eyes narrowed. "I find it strange you should choose to live in Bath, when it holds such bad memories for you. I thought you hated the place."

She blushed at how well he knew her, or once did, then squared her shoulders. "I am the unmarried middle daughter. I go where I am sent." This time she managed to extract herself from his invisible hold, and set off down the corridor.

Frederick was quickly beside her again. She sighed at his persistence."Anne ... wait… I did not mean, I should have thought. Of course you must be with your family. It was foolish of me to question you."

Anne was quiet for a while, she knew she should move away. That if they were seen conversing like this -alone in a deserted hallway- they could both be compromised, just as he had clumsily remarked earlier. But Frederick was blocking her way once more and seemed in no hurry to move – like her feet, which seemed to take on roots and were pinned in place. "Louisa is very fond of the sea." she blurted out, surprising them both.

"Is she?" he asked flatly, as if he could not care less.

"Yes she is, almost as much as she is fond of the navy."

Frederick smiled, believing she was teasing him as she once did. "And what of your opinion Miss Anne? How does the Navy fare in your eyes?"

"My opinion is of no consequence," she said automatically, but the pain in his eyes at her dismissive answer made her instantly regret her words. "As it always has," she added quietly and paused. His attention was concentrated soley on her, as if her next words were the most important in the world. "I hold those who serve, in the highest regard." She bit her lip trying to supress a smile as his face lit up. He smiled widely and genuinely, and she felt her heart quicken and her legs wobble at the sight. He took a step towards her.

"Anne! Anne! Where the devil are you? Breakfast is about to be served." Charles voice boomed up the stairs, startling them both and interrupting whatever was about to happen between them.

"I am here." She squeaked and cleared her throat, "at your service, as always."

With a last look at his disappointed face, she passed him. No further words were spoken, for none were needed. It was obvious to both, the sentiments behind her innocent parting statement.


	9. Chapter 9

**_What If …_** **Anne confessed resentment?**

 _"You will stay, I am sure; you will stay and nurse her."_

Anne looked at him and around at the others waiting for an answer and nodded, explaining what little she required in assisting her, before walking away quietly. She was making herself busy in the kitchen, when he found her.

She did not have to turn around to see who it was. The sound of his footsteps had haunted her for years. Since that last time when they walked away from her. She'd never forgotten that sound, she'd recognise that tread anywhere. She refused to turn; to acknowledge him, for fear of what she might say.

He cleared his throat behind her. "I fear I may have placed you in a rather impossible position, asking you to stay. Did you wish to return home?" he asked innocently. She bit her lip to bite back words she could not speak. Did he think that was what was bothering her? She shook her head once. "So you will stay?" he asked again.

She looked to the heavens, praying for patience, for the strength to appear composed and eager to help. Alas, none came. The words were out of her mouth before she could prevent them. "Stay? You wish me to stay and nurse her." she paused. "For you." She turned around and found him avoiding her eyes. "So that when she is better, at my hand, you shall be free to marry her. Is that what you are suggesting?"

His head snapped up and he looked surprised. Surprise at being questioned on his motives no doubt, Anne thought. "And what of me then? I become the distant relation, who saved the life of the woman you love." She swallowed down the lump in her throat, blinking away unshed tears. She would not let him see her cry. He opened his mouth as if he was going to say something, but then closed it again. "You would have me remain here, at your side, and watch while you move on, while you give your heart to someone else. Do you really think so little of me, you would put me through that?" He didn't answer. She let out a frustrated moan, "it did not even cross your mind, did it? You did not even give a moments pause to reflect on how this might affect me. You thought only of yourself!"

"I thought of Louisa." he snapped. "I thought of the only truly capable person of our party who could be selfless enough to put the well being of another first. Regardless of their personal feelings, and nurse her back to health. I thought of you! You are the only person I trust implicitly. I was not thinking of myself! I do not want to marry Louisa!" he exclaimed. His eyes widened and he looked around him wildly, she wasn't sure if his shock was at being accused of such a thing, or that he had spoken his inner feelings aloud. A part of her wanted to believe it was that the thought had never even occurred to him, but she knew it could not be that.

"But … but everyone thinks-" she trailed off.

His eyes softened and he stepped towards her. "Well then everyone is wrong." He corrected her softly but firmly.

She tried to suppress a smile. No matter the joy she felt at hearing him say such a thing, there was still the matter of everyone else's expectations. "You should take heed of what I am saying. It is thought –nay– expected, that you shall offer for her. Charles, I believe, suspects there is already an understanding between the two of you."

Frederick ran a hand through his hair, "this cannot be so!"

They both fell silent. Anne cleared her throat, bringing his attention -and eyes- back to her, "will you offer for her, I mean, if it is what is expected?"

He looked at her with a pained expression, as if the mere idea physically hurt him. "If it is what is to be done. I shall."

She felt the burn of the tears in her eyes and was desperate to be away from him before she let them fall. She nodded her understanding, folded her arms across her aching heart and walked away quickly out of the room. He attempted to stop her, he even called her by name, but she refused to turn. Leaving Captain Wentworth alone and more confused than ever.


	10. Chapter 10

**_What If_** **… Frederick had told Anne he could not marry Louisa?**

 _"It was growing quite dusk, however, before they were in the neighbourhood of Uppercross, and there had been total silence among them for some time, Henrietta leaning back in the corner, with a shawl over her face, giving the hope of her having cried herself to sleep; when, as they were going up their last hill, Anne found herself all at once addressed by Captain Wentworth. In a low, cautious voice, he said-"_

"Anne, about what I said, back at the Harville's … You have to know … I must tell you-" he started.

"Do not!" Anne interrupted, sharply but quietly as to not awaken Henrietta. "Do not speak it. _Please_ , it is too painful. It is what it is. Louisa shall be well and you shall be very happy together."

All was quiet for a few moments, and she believed he was acknowledging she was correct in her observation.

"You are wrong." He murmured.

Her automatic reaction was to turn to him, to ensure it was his lips which had spoken the words, but she could not allow it. She could not look at him for fear of the final bit of hope remaining in her being quashed.

Frederick risked a glance at her, but her eyes were downcast on Henrietta's sleeping face. "Louisa shall be well, and we undoubtedly will be forced together -by my own stupidity, and I shall endeavour to make her happy, but I shall be forever _unhappy_ in that life." he added quietly.

Anne finally turned from Henrietta to him, "you must not say such things" she hissed. "You may not love her now, but you may develop feelings for her in the future. There are many happy marriages that were not born from love. Louisa is an amiable girl from a good family and you should consider yourself lucky to have made such a fortunate match." She looked away embarrassed at her outburst, but unable to stop the words from falling from her lips. "Many of us, may not be as lucky." she admitted sadly. "You may grow to love her."

"And what if I do not?" he whispered also, not wanting to wake their companion. "Am I to live in this sham of a marriage to a girl I could never love, when my heart is broken in two?" Anne blushed unable to answer him, so he continued. "Are we to have children, share memories, grow old together, when all the while I would be wishing she was-"

"Please!" she interrupted, Henrietta stirred at Anne's raised voice, but the gentle rocking of the carriage soothed her back to sleep. "Please" Anne whispered urgently. "Stop this! I am begging you. It is too late. We must learn to live with our regrets, our mistakes," she discreetly wiped away a tear that had escaped her. "Without the ones we love." she added sadly.

Frederick's eyes flew to meet hers, but she had already turned her face away again. He could not dare to imagine; could it be? Did she still have feelings for him? He had put all of her previous grievances against such a match, down to her jealousy for want of his wealth, now her family were in reduced circumstances, he had never thought it possible she may actually still harbour feelings of ardour for him; that she could still care for him as she once did. As he felt for her, then, and now. He opened his mouth to say as much when he remembered her words. She was right, it was too late. What good could such words do them now? Confessions of love were no good when one was already considered engaged to another. It was only destroying them both, prolonging the agony, if she did not want to talk about it, he would not force her to.

A few minutes of tense silence ensued. Anne had closed her eyes against the reality slowly hitting her in full force; he would marry Louisa.

"The fault was mine alone." His whispered words seemed as loud as a trumpet in the silent confines of the carriage. He flinched against them. "I encouraged her, I let her playfulness and flattery towards me, take over my better judgement, she is nothing but a child and I should have been responsible."

Anne almost snorted out loud. Louisa maybe young but she had known what she as doing, granted she probably did not intend to fall from the step, but she had up until that point known exactly what she had been doing. She had planned to attach herself to Frederick since she first heard of him and Anne could hardly blame her for that, but it wasn't right that he should blame himself for the mischief of a girl. Louisa's head had been filled with ideas of matrimony rather than sense, and she had suffered because of it, why should Captain Wentworth suffer too? He had nothing to feel guilty for. She sighed, "She is a grown woman." Anne clamped her mouth shut, before she said anything more to taint Louisa's character. She was still family, and a friend after all. "What is done is done. All you can do now, is what is right. You are an honourable man Captain, and you will do the right thing. I know you shall." She said adamantly.

Frederick turned to face her, his face taught and strained, "and just what _is_ the right thing to do Miss Elliot?"

Anne looked past him and announced: "we are here."

The subject was closed. She would not listen to anymore. It would do nothing but cause distress.

He slowed the horses, exhaled long and loudly, and then with a blank expression asked: _"I have been wondering what we had best do. She must not appear at first. She could not stand it. I have been thinking whether you had not better remain in the carriage with her, while I go in and break it to Mr and Mrs Musgrove. Do you think this is a good plan?"_

She agreed and watched from the carriage as he disappeared inside the house, awakening it's inhabitants with the grave news. She imagined the looks on the faces of Mr and Mrs Musgrove as he shared with them the events of earlier.

The rush of activity both inside and out of the house, signalled he had broken the bad news and she knew she must make her entrance with Henrietta. She was wondering how she could climb down safely herself and then help Henrietta, when he was at her side offering his hand. "It is done. They are as to be expected. I have confessed my part in things and explained the situation. Mrs Musgrove is asking for her daughter. Allow me." He took Anne's hand and helped her down the step, holding on to her longer than necessary. He then turned his attention to the now woken Henrietta, lifting her from the carriage and carrying her inside. Anne followed, clutching her shawl that she had held tightly to her throughout the atmospheric journey, and only being slightly envious of the fact another woman was once again in his arms.

The house was in uproar as Mr Musgrove gave orders and requests to be followed, allowing them to prepare for their journey to Lyme. An apothecary had been summoned for Henrietta, even though Anne was sure a strong dose of salts would have done the job of pulling her out of her swoon just as well.

Anne positioned herself in a corner out of everyone's way, ready to be a help if needed. She felt eyes on her and looked across the room to find Captain Wentworth staring back at her. In a room filled with mayhem, it felt as if they were the only ones there. He raised an eyebrow at the chaos and she felt a smile tug at the corner of her mouth, in spite of everything. If it had been left to him –or her- the whole matter would have been organised without fuss, and little distress. As it was, it was not, and they were both forced to stay and bare witness.

When at last matters had been settled, Frederick begged to be excused, so that he could return to the Harville's post haste. Anne felt a pull inside of her. From here, she would surely travel to Bath as soon as transportation could be arranged. She would most likely not see him again for quite some time. He would most probably be married to Louisa when she did. She swallowed hard, straining to keep the tears that were threatening once again to fall, at bay. Frederick was already making his way outside, asking if a horse was ready for the journey back. Anne found it easy to slip outside amidst the commotion.

He looked up surprised when he saw her. She looked smaller stood there in the large courtyard. He fought the urge to gather her up in his arms and assure her all would be well and that he would find a solution, one that meant they could be together. Because the saddest truth in it all was, he could not make her any such promise. The fact of the matter was, he probably _would_ be forced to make an offer of Louisa, and Anne would end up married off to someone her father deemed necessary to redeem his status, or end up alone. He swallowed past a lump forming in his throat, and addressed her. "Miss Anne? Are the Musgrove's in need of me?"

"No, it is just …" she looked down embarrassed, but seemed to gather her strength and met his eyes once again. "Have a safe journey back, and please tell my sister I shall write to her once I am settled with my father."

He looked up as if just recollecting and realising what she meant. "You are to Bath."

"Yes. I doubt my presence here shall be required any longer."

He nodded. "Then I should wish you too a safe journey." They stood looking at each other unable to say the word they knew they must. "When do you leave?"

"I believe I shall be travelling with Lady Russel, and it is her wish to be there soon after Christmas."

He frowned at the mere mention of her god mother's name. "Oh I see." He answered sorrowfully. "Well then I suppose I should take my leave of you Miss Elliot." He took a step forward unsure what he meant to do, but he longed to be closer to her. "I wish you well."

"Thank you Captain." She looked down at the item clutched in her hands and offered it to him. "I …I thought you may be in need of this- for the journey. It is cold tonight." She explained.

He took the bundle from her without comprehension of what it was, and thanked her with a bow of the head, unable to speak; so touched by her gesture and the fact she had made it a point to say goodbye to him, despite everything that had passed between them. He quickly withdrew, climbed on to the now saddled horse and fled the scene.

Neither had said goodbye. For neither could.

It was not until later, when he was alone on the road, did he unwrap the bundle and see that it was Anne's own shawl she had offered him for comfort. He refused to use it. To taint the soft subtle scent of her which lingered, embedded in the fabric. Instead he placed it carefully in his saddlebag, hoping beyond hope, he would one day have the opportunity to return it to its owner.


	11. Chapter 11

**_What if_** **… Mr Elliot had been a little longer in returning to Mollands?**

 _"I am only waiting for Mr Elliot. He will be here in a moment, I am sure."_

"Oh." He sounded disappointed and she could tell. "Oh I see." He added, before turning to leave, when she reached for him, her hand had not even made contact with his sleeve and yet he stalled.

"I will however enjoy your company, should you wish to remain here with me, while I wait." She offered.

"Of course, An-Miss Elliot. It would be my privilege to assist you in this matter." He said rather loudly and then winked at her.

She almost gasped aloud at his blatant display of playfulness. She looked around to ensure no one had seen, but everyone was carrying on about their day oblivious to his actions. She risked a small smile back in return and he matched it with a wide grin. For a moment it was as if they had been transported back in time.

Frederick looked about him at the busy shoppers going about their business without any real knowledge or care of what they witnessing. He felt, as if it was such a momentous occasion the whole world should have stopped to observe. Here they were: Captain Wentworth and Anne Elliot, once again in a room together, filled with people and yet otherwise alone.

There was no more Louisa Musgrove between them. There was still the nagging problem of Mr Elliot's constant presence, but if he knew Anne at all like he liked to think that he did, he was sure she did not have feelings for her cousin like those she had once found herself in possession of for himself. Or indeed in receipt of from himself.

He caught the eye of a lady in his party and her gesture for them to join the others, but selfishly he refused silently. He wanted to share this precious time with no one else. Just her and him, as it had once been, as it would be once again, should his plans come into fruition.

He had meant to tell her his true feelings the first time he set eyes on her, not wanting to waste any more time, however her constant company was proving a problem. She was either at home with those he did not wish to reacquaint himself with, or abroad around Bath, with friends such as Lady Russel and Elliot. He knew she had been alone some of the time, the Admiral had spoken with her on the street just a few days past. He knew once she learned of her sister and the Musgrove's planned trip to Bath, she would be sure to make her way to their residence as soon as she could. He would therefore have to make do with these stolen moments -however few and far between.

He had caught her look, when he told of his torment at Benwick moving on to a less superior woman than his lost love. Surely she could detect his hidden meaning, the truth behind those thinly veiled words? He had wanted her to know that, unlike Benwick, _his_ heart was not so easily given to another. It still remained as it was and always would: in her possession. She owned his heart like he had once owned hers, or like he liked to think that he did.

The way she sometimes looked at him now, so familiar, so reminiscent of days gone by, it made him want to stop and question her. Even when they were in the presence of others, to interrupt any other conversation, and ask her out right why she had chosen to look at him then, at that precise moment. Most of the time he could of course guess why it was that particular moment, she had chosen to glance his way. A story, maybe or a piece of music; something that would trigger a memory; a detail from their well-hidden past.

Only it wasn't so hidden anymore. Sophia and the Admiral were aware, as was Edward. He wasn't sure how many on her side, he knew for certain her father and Lady Russel, but he doubted Elizabeth or Mary could be knowledgeable of such information. Certainly the distaste Elizabeth still viewed him in, and the flirtatious attempts from Mary, were embarrassing to say the least. No, they could not be aware of how close they came to calling him brother.

Anne was starting to look around her, worrying her bottom lip nervously. He had been quiet too long. "I hear you have seen the Admiral and my sister a few times while you have been here."

She smiled. "Once or twice yes."

"Sophia seems pleased to be once more in your company. I think - _I know_ \- she has missed your conversations since you were removed from Uppercross. I do not think there are many in that area she has such things in common with, to warrant a friendship quite like yours. She talks of you often."

"I am sorry. I apologise if I have been in her company too often. You-"

"You misunderstand me," he interrupted, "I do not wish to scold you for it, only to thank you. It is a testament to your character, that you have been able to look past any resentfulness between the pair of us, and still remain her friend."

"I do not resent you, or our past." She admitted. "I should say it is more of a testament to Mrs Croft that she should choose to include me in her company, after what has passed between us. But I thank you anyway."

A gentleman apologised as he bumped into her trying to move past. The shop was becoming more and more full due to the continued rainfall and people seeking shelter, she was forced to step closer to him, so that barely six inches of space were present between them. "You are not angry with me then, for making a friend of your sister. I know in the beginning you were not overly pleased at the prospect."

"No, I think my sister understands the position we were all in, besides that was all a long time ago, and she knows not to think too much on it."

Anne wasn't sure if he was referring to their time spent at Uppercross or their time together eight years ago. But either way, she was pleased he was at least at peace with her friendship with his sister.

An idea entered Frederick's head; maybe just maybe, there was a way to get her almost alone and away from any of her kin who could put up walls between them again. His sister would be agreeable, nay pleased with the idea. He should ask Anne to accompany them for dinner one evening at Gay Street. He was sure, with no doubt Sophia's gentle -if not persistent- assistance, he could contrive a way for them to talk openly, to discuss all that had gone by, and maybe just maybe, reignite old feelings that were already stirring within him. "Miss Anne, I wonder if you would consider-"

"Yes" she interrupted eagerly, smiling unguardedly and genuinely for the first time in an age, directing it entirely at him.

He felt his breath leave his throat and was unable to finish his sentence. She stepped forward, almost closing the gap completely, the umbrella still clasped firmly in her hands, as if it were the most precious thing in the world. Oh how he wished he was that umbrella. "That is, you would be most welcome, should you wish to-"

Mr Elliot, most unfortunately, chose that instance to appear in the doorway, hastily making his way over to them. Anne immediately put the distance back between herself and the Captain once again. She greeted her cousin, who apologised profusely for his tardiness and declared he was now available to escort her home, with hardly a word in Frederick's direction.

The moment was gone. Lost to another, one who would perhaps never know how his presence had ruined another man's chance at happiness. Or maybe, he did know, maybe it was his cruel way in which to determine they should never be joined. Wentworth swallowed hard against the silent insult, the repercussion of which was balling his fists at his sides and wanting him to call the fellow out, just for interrupting their conversation.

Anne's eyes were still fixed on him, begging for him to continue, but Elliot was over shadowing her, he leaned in -almost too close, urging her to follow him. He looked at her with too much familiarity and intimacy for one who barely knew her.

Wentworth shook his head to clear it, and realised too late she must have thought the action was meant for her. She heaved a sigh and reluctantly turned her attentions to her cousin, assuring him she was ready. She passed the Captain back his umbrella, claiming to no longer have a need for it. He watched her leave Mollands and for a long while after that, despite the presence of his party calling him back. He no longer wished to drink tea and share small talk. He wished to follow her home and keep a watchful eye on her cousin as he coiled around her like a viper ready to strike.

Anne would have no knowledge of it, she would think him nothing but a friend. Family, with whom she was safe to relax and be herself, if only she knew how wonderful 'herself' was, she would realise how easy it is for one like Elliot to become enchanted by her. He would be ensnared by her. In time she would learn his real motives behind his sudden interest, but by then it would be too late. Elliot wished to marry her that was for certain, what wasn't so certain was whether or not Anne would accept.

Had Wentworth himself done enough to prove to her she had other options? He could only hope so.


	12. Chapter 12

**So this is it, the last of the twelve chances, I believe, our lovely couple missed. They could have used these opportunities to come clean with each other, declare their feelings and be together once again, but then the story of Persuasion wouldn't be half as good as it is. In the end, I am persuaded to think Miss Austen had the angst amount just right.**

 ** _What if_** **… Wentworth had taken the empty seat?**

 _"He looked down towards the bench, as if he saw a place on it well worth occupying."_

She followed his eyes as they took in the empty place beside her, once she realised he was considering it, she silently pleaded with him to take it. In a moment seemingly frozen in time, he glanced around the room and in most particular, at her party, before clearing his throat. "May I?" he gestured to the seat.

Two little words as innocent as they come and yet filled with so much hidden meaning. Unable to speak in fear of ruining the moment, she nodded enthusiastically, rather more enthusiastically than she had planned on, and indeed was necessary, and yet he seemed pleased with her reaction and quickly took to the bench. It was only a small space and she noticed somewhat guiltily, his leg was hanging over the far end most uncomfortably. There was space on her other side and yet, selfishly she relished the feeling of him squeezed beside her; their sides touching; arm to arm, thigh to thigh. Frederick noticed it too, and was both confused and relieved to find her quite at ease with their current close proximity.

"I am sorry you are not enjoying the concert more, as I thought – _wished-_ you might." She reiterated.

He chuckled, and coloured, "I do not know, upon reflection, maybe I am enjoying it after all. In fact, I believe the next part will be quite pleasing." He held her gaze, staring into her big brown eyes, trying to decipher the meaning in them. Did she still feel all she had unwillingly admitted to in the carriage the night he returned her and Henrietta to Uppercross? Or was the chance of returning to her Kellynch with her cousin, too tempting an offer? Had he already made her an offer? Was that why Elliot openly favoured her company, and the reason behind her new found ability to be at ease with himself, even returning to a friendliness long forgotten? He could only hope he was not too late.

Anne was lost in her own thoughts. She had almost all those she considered closest to her, sitting behind her. She could feel their eyes burrowing into her back, watching her every move. She knew they would have seen Captain Wentworth repeatedly seek her out and now to take it one step further, and join her, without a word of acknowledgement to the rest of her party. She should retreat, change seats or at least involve someone else in their conversation, but she could not bring herself to make even the smallest change to their current situation. She would deal with the repercussion later, for now she was enjoying just being them again.

After a somewhat stilted beginning, the couple soon fell into easy conversation, commenting on the room, those in attendance, deliberating the reason behind those who were not. A couple of ladies walked by them, looking pointedly at Frederick, commenting on his navy uniform and overall pleasing appearance, in a -in Anne's opinion- far too loud a conversation, that could certainly be overheard by those closest –particularly Frederick- and most probably the majority of the room. Frederick however failed to notice them, ignoring the ladies and the comments, and instead only had eyes for his companion who now addressed him on the subject. "Tell me Captain, does your uniform bring about this response wherever you go?"

He coloured and looked down at his feet rather embarrassed. "I suppose it does, yes."

"I wonder."

"What?"

"I wonder if that is why you choose to wear it so often. Do you enjoy the compliments paid to you by the young ladies?"

He thought for a moment she was serious, but his keen eyes caught the sparkle of mischief in hers and he smiled, pleased her playful ease with him was at long last returning. "One has to do what one must, in order to stand out in an otherwise sea of well-dressed gentlemen, how else can an ageing sailor expect to gain the interest of eligible young ladies?"

Anne's joyful expression slipped and turned sombre. He surmised she had read more in to his words than simple banter. He had intended to goad her into a debate, but instead he saw hurt behind her eyes. "That, and wearing it reminds me of happier times. Besides, there is only one lady I am anxious to impress, and if memory serves me correct, she first noticed me before I had reached the rank of Captain. So this would be wasted on her." He had more than hinted she was the lady he was referring to, and to reduce any confusion left to nothing, he added, "I am already aware she holds those who serve in the highest regard."

She made a sound between a sob and gasp. Forgetting the volume of people present, propriety and decorum, as the orchestra took positon and took up their instruments once more, Frederick made a bold move. He needed her to know without any doubt, he was intent on renewing his feelings. Discreetly, he reached for her hand. She did not tense or flinch, he concluded it was not unwelcome, it was as if she had been waiting for such a move and he chastised himself for not taking the step earlier. Their hands were shielded from the other members of the audience by his body, he held her small gloved hand in his loosely enough so that she could let go if she wished, but securely enough that she would know he did not want her to, and that he meant it. Neither said a word, but sat silently observing the front of the room.

Emboldened by her reaction, or lack thereof, and urged on by her obvious acceptance, Frederick decided then and there, to declare his feelings. "Anne," She turned to face him, her eyes wet and so reminiscent of the past, his words almost caught in his throat but he swallowed. "You must know, I have never-"

"Anne, Anne!" Elliot once again interrupted their moment. The surprise at hearing his voice and so close to her ear, shocked Anne into not only letting go of Frederick's hand, but turning her back on him while she addressed her cousin. It was a reaction –an unintentional act unconsciously performed. She had not meant to transfer her attentions so violently, and certainly did not wish him to think she valued Mr Elliot's company above his, or that she would prefer to have been seated by cousin.

It was however too late, Frederick had felt her slight and concluded what he had only suspected earlier; she was in some way attached to Mr Elliot, and she was too kind, too polite to inform him of his folly. Elliot was engaging her in some discussion about her assisting Miss Carteret. Frederick wasn't paying attention to what was being said, but rather to Elliot's closeness and Anne's reaction. She looked uncomfortable, once or twice she even looked back over her shoulder apologetically at him as if she was being placed in an impossible position. He had seen that look before. Well this time he would make it easier for her, he stood up causing her to abandon her attentions of Mr Elliot and concentrate solely on him. Mr Elliot was forced to cease his conversation mid-sentence.

Anne looked at Wentworth beseechingly, but he was undeterred. "I beg your pardon Miss Anne, but I must bid you good night. I must get home at once."

Pleading turned to misunderstanding.

"But the concert, I thought," she glanced down at her hand he had been up until recently holding in his and blushed, "I had believed you were enjoying it. As was I." Her colour deepened. "Is not this song worth staying for?"

He paused as if he was indeed considering it, but as he did, Mr Elliot leaned in behind Anne again and his expression was enough to tell Frederick all he need to know, he shook his head, "no!" he snapped, gathering his things and stepping from the row. " _There is nothing worth my staying for."_

 **A/N And we all know what happened next …**


End file.
